One little, two little, three little chest hairs April 21, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..Tags: chest hair, humor
6 comments
Easy ladies (and Pricing Jeff)! Those bad boys are my chest hairs. They’re the only ones I got so I make sure to treat them right. I shampoo and condition them everyday. Just a dab will do the the trick.
I know there are women out there who enjoy a chest filled with hair. They may love the rain forrest coming out of the shirt, or the gold chains dangling in the denseness. Those women aren’t for me (obviously).
I do shave them once a year so I can keep track of their progress and see if I’ve added a few. I’m also not afraid to use chest hair Rogaine For Men (I seriously hope they don’t make chest hair Rogaine For Women!) if I notice I’ve lost a few.
Alright, I gotta keep this one short because I want to give you enough time to stare at the manliness.
Go Bruins!
ps, if you look hard enough you should be able to see them I promise they exist!
I really need a haircut February 25, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..Tags: bad hair day, funny, humor, justin bieber, Target
18 comments
Justin Bieber? You forget to buy hair gel one day and you show up with different looking hair and you get thrown in with the likes of Justin Bieber. One person at works says Justin Bieber hair and everyone starts laughing. Somebody brings out the Bieber poster, tells me to hold it, and cameras start clicking. I was on the red and khaki carpet of Target.
The shit was put up as the wallpaper on the work computers and I was tagged on Facebook within minutes. I had at least 8 people tell they liked my Bieber picture within 10 minutes.
I joked to someone about having a bunch of tween girls chasing me around and I was reminded that I’d also have their cougar mothers…
“And I was like baby, baby…”
and…
“One less lonely cougar mom.”
Happy Birthday… February 23, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..Tags: 25th anniversary, Legend of Zelda, video game, Zelda
2 comments
…Legend of Zelda!
The Legend of Zelda was released 25 years ago in Japan (18 months later in U.S.) and is still one of my all time favorite games. The storyline was epic and so was the music. I felt it was my personal mission to help Link. I spent hours pushing rocks and burning trees! Hey, sounds like college! Anyways, the game was huge and I have good memories of it.
A funny thing is that I have friends who aren’t that old and are avid gamers (that’s geek speak for people who play video games). There are kids who came out of the womb with a nintendo controller in their hand. JP from the movie Grandma’s Boy beat the Legend of Zelda before he could walk!
Makes me feel old knowing that a video game I played as a kid is now 25 years old but I guess the gray hairs should have been the first clue…and the aching back…and the ear hair…and the peeing problem…ok that’s enough.
Who has some good Legend of Zelda memories?
Evacuate the Dance Floor February 18, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..Tags: humor, Target
9 comments
A bit of an emergency at Target today and we had to hightail it outta there. Nothing to be worried about folks just your average gas leak.
I wish I could say the evacuation was smooth like we had rehearsed, but it reminded me of the movie Kindergarden Cop when all of Arnold’s kids were running around screaming! Seriously lady there is no need to run me over I think you’ll live.
Okay, that was a joke and everything was smooth. We went to the back of the parking lot like good kids. We were out there for over an hour and I even (unknowingly) entertained some of the masses with my dance moves (or lack thereof). I think I tried to do the Tootsie Roll and jumped into a Macarana. I wanted a group Electric Slide or a Cha Cha Slide. I tried to “Charlie Brown” but nobody knows how so I danced like one of the kids from Peanuts…nuts being the key word!
The fun stopped when I noticed I was being filmed. I won’t get embarrassed telling people I pee’d on my pants but my dance moves aren’t for public consumption..unless I’ve had some drinks!
A Real Life Superman? February 18, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc., Uncategorized.Tags: helping others, Superman, true story
5 comments
I’m going to share a cool story from a friend of mine. The story has some humor and a definite ‘aww’ factor for some of the ladies.
My buddy Kevin Feldman is a a big Superman fan (as everyone should be). He’s also a good human being that believes in helping people out whether it be a flat tire or a broken zipper…on a jacket people he’s not a prevert! This story involves doing something most people would do, but with a pretty cool ending in my opinion. The following is an email sent by Kevin to a group of our friends and I’m going to share it with you.
so yesterday I am in another hotel at a meeting. I see some couple arguing, which is a bonus for me cause as you know, I love a good domestic dispute. I watch a little then hop on the escalator going up. All the sudden I hear this girl scream like I have never heard before. Turn around & see the little girl has gotten her fingers caught in the escalator. By this time, I am about 3 -4 steps up from the bottom. I jump down and hit the red button to shut the escaltor off. The girl is crying in pain and now her brother is quite upset. The mom & dad, who had let the kids wander off while they continued arguing had come running over. I told the dad to go to the restaurant & get some ice. The mom was thanking me while taking care of her daughter. The little boy looked at me still crying & I opened my shirt up to show the S. He got this big smile on his face & I put my my finger to my mouth & went shhhhhh. I turned and went back up the elevator to go to my meeting & I hear the boy go “mom, that was Superman — he helped jenny”.
You just never know when the S will come in handy.
Is Kevin Superman? He is to that little kid and his sister that’s for sure. I’m believe a lot of people would have done the same thing in this situation, but Kevin has a history of ‘being in the right place at the right time.’ I think it’s the other things that are deserving of some recognition even on this small blog with only my friends and family as readers.
He went on to mention that wearing the Superman ‘S’ is a reminder to do the little things to help people out. I know that sounds corny and I paraphrased because I deleted that email, but don’t you wish more people were like that? How many times have you been in a jam and watched as people passed you by? How much better would the world be if more people wore Superman shirts under their everyday clothes?
I got this email at work the other day and I read it out loud to a group of people in the breakroom and it got great positive reactions. People laughed and thought it was a cool story. I love Superman too and I’m happy to share this little bit of Kevin for both of my readers out there. Hope you enjoyed.
Have a great weekend everybody.
The Ice Wins Again February 8, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..Tags: fall, fall on ice, humor
3 comments
Been awhile since I’ve posted a nice drinking story…but you probably didn’t need me to tell you that if you figured out I fell on my ass!
I watched the UFC this past Saturday night at my buddy’s house and we were drinking and having a good time. Our friend Greg doesn’t drink too much but he decided to have some adult beverages and just stay the night. I would have crashed there too but they have a cat and I’m allergic to the little shits. I didn’t have to walk too far so I just started walking my way home. There weren’t many cars on the roads so I didn’t have to play Frogger and dodge oncoming cars. I got a little more than halfway home and that’s when it happened…
BAM!
I fell flat on my ass in a huge puddle lined with ice. I went down hard too. A beer went flying out of my pocket and down the street. I got up pretty quick when I saw my litle buddy sliding away. This wasn’t going to be a Tom Hanks/Wilson moment from Cast Away I was going down the hill to get him!
So I waddle myself as quickly and safely as I could. Actually, it was probably more like a shuffle. I catch up to the now disoriented beer and put him back in my pocket. I’m soaking wet now to by the way, and I turn around to head back up…
WHAM! “DOWN GOES FRAZIER! DOWN GOES FRAZIER!”
I shit you not I fell again! Right on my ass and back both times. I’m lucky I didn’t crack my skull. This might have been karma’s way of getting me back for dropping my friend Jess last Saturday night. The SAME BEER took off again and I chased him again. Don’t get excited I don’t fall again.
The moment I picked up the beer the first time I knew I had a blog. Here’s a funny video of people falling on ice.
Town snow vs. City snow February 1, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..Tags: city snow, humor, personal, snow, town snow
2 comments
I currently live in Manchester, New Hampshire. I love New Hampshire for many reasons and snow is one of them (against my will at some times). I also realize that Manchester isn’t New York or Boston, but it’s still city and I grew up in a town.
Growing up I had to worry about:
-shoveling
-a) walkway and steps
-b) large driveway
-c) back porch and stairs
-Going sledding!
-Drinking hot chocolate and watching cartoons
Now that I live in a city we have to worry about:
-shoveling all kinds of stuff multiple times
-moving your car so the plow can do his thing
-moving your car back
-making sure the mailman can get to your mailbox so you got to shovel more
-duck giant icicles hanging from your building
-Carefully creep far into the road to see around GIANT SNOWBANKS!
City snow is freaking ugly too. Dirt gets all up in it and footprints cover everything else. Back where I come from you would still be able to see large patches of untouched snow. The trees were always the most beautiful when they had freshly fallen snow on them.
Don’t mind me I’m just ticked off that we’re supposed to get another foot and a half. Seriously, where the heck are we gonna put all the snow? There’s no more room! This is getting ridiculous. My nightmare last night involved witnessing an evil pitch for a cruel television series and it went something like this.
‘We’re gonna pick a place like Manchester, NH and drop like a foot of snow on them. Then, we’ll drop another 20 inches. After that…how about another foot of snow? That’s just January folks. We’ll also celebrate the beginning of February with…wait for it…ANOTHER 20 INCHES!!! Oh, it’ll be great and we’ll just see how the people will react and the audience will love it and we’ll all get rich and famous.’
So I just want to say that the joke is over and we can save the rest of the snow until next December…ok fine, I can compromise and accept some snow on Thanksgiving. Gives me an excuse for not traveling.
I’m making a comeback… January 31, 2011
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc., Uncategorized.6 comments
…and I’m not just talking about writing blog posts.
I’m not going to give you all the sad details as to why I stopped for awhile. I was letting the life beat me down and I just took it like a little bitch. Sometimes you have to go down in order to build yourself back up. That’s what I’m doing now and it starts with me rejoining the world of friends.
I’ve always known I was lucky in that department. I’ve been getting words of encouragement from newer friends and some that have put up with me for years. I appreciate them all and I want to prove their faith in me is justified.
I wasn’t just sitting around feeling sorry for myself. I was also thinking of new ideas and different ways for me to be creative. I realized a long time ago that an office job would put me in an early grave, but free blogs don’t pay the bills.
Anywho, I had a long weekend and I’m pretty beat (tiring going out and dropping one of your best friends on her head)…sorry Jess! I’m rediscovering my smile and I’m going back to my blog as therapy and some good old fashion positive reinforcement so feel free to tell me I’m awesome (tell me I suck and I won’t approve your comment).
Thank you to ALL my amazing friends!
Some people need to loosen up December 20, 2010
Posted by todoubled22 in Misc..5 comments
“The only thing worse them having to work is being unemployed and not being able to afford to drink on Saturday nights. Enjoy your paycheck!” – Me (me@yahoo.com aka annonymous email)
This was a comment on my last blog. Apparently, this annonymous person thinks I’m insensitive to the plight of the unemployed. I know there are unemployed people who still make more money than me so what do I fucking care if I make a joke about having to work on a weekend?
Anyone who knows me knows I’m happy to have a job and keep a roof over my head. I can sit at my desk and go on the internet and write these blogs and check out porn sites and I’m thankful for that.
I write things tongue in cheek. I poke fun at myself quite a bit. I’ll write about embarrassing things (hard nippleitis..getting my head stuck in a tree). I write about the fact that I’m afraid of women and even the mistakes I’ve made.
My reply to this comment is to loosen the fuck up. I don’t bitch and complain about shit here. I try to keep things light hearted and am never afraid to be the butt of a joke. If I bitch about having to work on a Sunday, then you have to fucking deal with it or go read some other jabroni’s blog.
What do you guys think? Was I insensitive to people who are unemployed at the moment because I made tried to write an entertaining blog about having to work on a weekend, in a RETAIL store, during the CHRISTMAS season?
Couldn't Think of It 