Jello Shot Night Recap

Before I go any further I want to freely admit that I pregamed at home before Jello Shot Night and I totally forgot to bring the Mad Libs. I know I fucked up and it would have been an awesome night to do it because people were trashed! My Bacardi Dragon Fruit Jello shots were a big success and had ample strength without losing flavor.
(I totally bullshit that statement. All I know is that I liked ‘em and most everyone else said they were fucking great too).

Aside from the Jello shots, I mixed a bunch of very manly Micheloeb Ultra. A taller and thinner can so you can tell yourself it’s less fattening than other beers. A drunk man’s logic is as good as any I’ve ever known so I’m going with it. I also like to tell myself to drink more hard liquor because I won’t be drinking all the empty calories you get with beer. Hard liquor comes with other problems: Blackouts, puking, defecating while passed out in the shower you get the picture. Enough about college…

We also had some Beer Pong/Beirut going on at my friend Holly’s. I did not play any of those games because I went all Howard Hughes germephobe and wouldn’t share cups with the sick kid. He was the sick kid and I didn’t want to get Bubonic plague, SARS, or the damned Bird Flu just to prove my beer pong prowess. Shit, does that make me wicked old? I wanted to play the water in the cups way. Fuck that, I’m not sick today so I’ll take that as a win.

The other thing I remember from the party was having to walk up some steep steps to use the bathroom in her apartment. I did the right thing for a few trips but you know what it’s like once you break the seal. I got sick of doing that so I started to pee somewhere out front. Might have been her neighbors house by this point I wouldn’t remember. I probably looked like some kind of prevert peeing in the bushes outside a window. Hey, don’t get mad it was mostly water anyways!

Good times were had by all as usual. Today is the official start of summer and I’m looking forward to all that is to come.